Thursday, August 22, 2013

Portland Singles Reviews Signs Of A Jealous & Possessive Boyfriend

Are you dating a man who seems perfect most of the time, but seems a bit jealous on the inside?  Read these signs from the matchmakers at Portland Singles that will help you figure out if the man you're dating is a possessive boyfriend.  And find out what you can do about it.

Is it really bad to be a possessive lover?  After all, everyone is possessive, at least during the beginning stages of the relationship.  When you display a sign of possessiveness, you might be seen as a woman who just loves her man a lot and is scared of losing him.  But there is a thin line between showing possessiveness or showing possessiveness as control and dominance, explains Portland Singles.

Are You Dating A Jealous & Possessive Partner?

Jealousy and possessiveness can be cute, especially in the beginning, right?  You laugh about it, you tell your friends and family about it, and you feel really in love because the man you're with can't be away from you for a second.  Your boyfriend's possessiveness shows you that he really loves you, and it makes you feel like you're the only woman in his eyes.  But what if his possessiveness goes to the extreme, to the point that you can't live your own life?  How can you tell if he's being loving or controlling when you can't tell them apart?  You might think your boyfriend is being possessiveness only because he loves you.

But the truth is, love doesn't have much to do with his possessiveness.  More often than not, it's his own insecurities that make him jealous and possessiveness, explains Portland Singles.  And beyond giving him love and affection, there is not much you can do to change his ways.

Jealousy & Possessiveness Run Parallel

When your boyfriend gets jealous of you, he's going to feel insecure.  And when he feels insecure of you, he will become possessiveness, explains Portland Singles.  And each time he shows his possessiveness and gets his way, he becomes more powerful in the relationship.  And he uses this power to control you.  By you giving into his possessiveness, it makes him assume that he is the final authority in the relationship.

Jealousy and possessiveness is a horrible cycle, which goes on and on.  And regardless of how much you try to help your boyfriend feel better and loved, he might choose to see the flaws instead of the good.  The only way a man is able to control his jealousy and possessiveness is by confronting himself.  You can give him plenty of affection and make him feel loved, but there is only so much you can do, unless he puts in his own efforts to try to change, explains Portland Singles.

Signs Of A Jealous & Possessiveness Boyfriend...

It is never easy to tell a good boyfriend from a possessiveness one.  After all, a little bit of possessiveness behavior is acceptable in a relationship.  Today, the matchmakers of Portland Singles will review some signs that let you know if you're dating a jealous and possessiveness man.  If you notice a handful of these signs in your boyfriend, then chances are, you are dating a possessiveness man--Someone who is a little insecure with controlling behaviors. 

But you notice a lot of these signs in your boyfriend or husband, then it's time to talk to him, because things will get worse. 

Your Decision Making

He constantly wants to play a part in any decision you make.  And he just can't seem to accept it if you pick something he doesn't approve of.

His Possessiveness When It Comes To Love

Every time you point the finger at him about how possessiveness he is, he tells you he's possessiveness because he's deeply in love with you.

He Stalks

He stalks you and tries to find out everything about you--From who you were out with, to who the last person to call your phone was. 

New Experiences

He is very protective of you and doesn't want you to try anything without him, explains Portland Singles.  He acts like your life is in danger when you're not with him, and he throws a pity party when you try something new without him.

He Gets Mad

He gets mad over the little things, especially if it involves another man.  He doesn't want you to create any new memories unless he's involved in the picture, explains Portland Singles. 

He Knows Everything

He knows everything that's going on in your life.  And if you don't share something with him, he gets angry about it until you tell him every detail about it anyway.


He wants to know every password to every account that you have--And even if you do not share the passwords with him, he'll threaten you until you do.

You Answer His Calls

It doesn't matter if you're talking to the president of your company, you must answer his calls when he calls.  And if you ignore his calls, he accuses you of being a horrible girlfriend or even cheating on him. 

He Brings Down Your Friends

He brings down all your friends and finds flaws in all of them, especially the men.  And each time one of them lets you down, he makes sure to show you how unreliable everyone in your life is, all except him, explains Portland Singles.

His Wall Revolves Around You

His entire world revolves around you and he makes you think he acts like this because he loves you.  He also wants to be the center of your world and wants you to give him preferential attention over anyone else in your life. 

He Tags With

He's very insecure of how loved you make him feel.  He doesn't like it when you go out with friends without him, so he tags with you--Especially if men will be invited to the event. 

When You Speak About Someone

He hates it when you speak highly of someone else.  When you point out something nice about someone, he finds flaws in them.  He's extremely competitive and wants you to look up to him for everything.

When You Go Out

You might not realize it, but when you go out, you're boyfriend calls you constantly.  He doesn't like it when you go out with friends and is always trying to find out when you're coming back home.

Remember, not all these signs and traits are dangerous for a relationship.  But there is definitely a thin line between tolerable behavior and too much possessiveness, explains Portland Singles.  And the threshold should be made by you.  Some women might love their own independence, while others love depending on a man.  Every woman is different and has different expectations.  But these signs you see here from Portland Singles are all signs of jealousy and possessiveness in one way or another. 

So how many of these signs do you notice in your boyfriend or husband?  And do you believe they're acceptable for your relationship, or is it something you need to sit down to him and talk about?  Well, that's up to you to decide.  

Portland Singles Reveals How To Forgive Your Partner After They've Cheated On You

Are you struggling to deal with a cheating partner or spouse?  Are you just not able to get over this traumatic event and forgive your partner or move on with your life?  Find out the best advice from the dating and relationship experts at Portland Singles when it comes to moving on after an act of infidelity in your relationship.

One of the most traumatic experiences a person can experience in their life is finding out that their partner cheated on them.  The consequences can vary from rage, to despair, to depression lasting for many years.  But as impossible as it might sound, even after such traumatic experiences, it is possible to pick up the pieces and forgive a betraying partner.  So if you are looking for ways to forgive your cheating partner, Portland Singles has the answer for you.  

Allow Yourself To Be Mad About It

Take time to completely mourn at the loss of trust you have experienced in your romantic relationship.  Every serious relationship involves a large amount of investment in the form of time, effort, and emotion, and when you discover that you have been cheated on by your partner, it can feel like the ground has been pulled away from you.  The first emotion you will feel will be anger, then despair, abandonment, and helplessness. Cry if you have to, and be as miserable as you want to be.  The grieving process is extremely important for you to move onto the next stage of healing and eventually forgiving your cheating partner. 

Think Before You Talk

After your partner has committed an affair, you're bound to have discussions about what happened and why.  By all means, ask your partner any question you want about why the affair happened in the first place.  Instead of coming to your partner with questions about whether they were better than you in bed, which will never reveal the right answer, ask your partner what made them stray from the relationship in the first place.  Also, do not lash out on your partner and their lover.  While your partner is admitting they cheated on you and apologizing for it, it might be tempting for you to launch an insult or make a sarcastic remark about it.  But don't do it, because if you lose your temper, you will say things you might regret later down the road, explains Portland Singles.  At the same time, never blame yourself for it.  Always keep in mind that although there might have been some troubles in your relationship, you did not cause the affair to start.  Difficult as these tips might seem to you, they are very important to do in order to move on, and in order to forgive your partner, explains PortlandSingles.  

Create A Little Distance

If you have suffered infidelity, it is only normal for you to feel pain, anger, and resentment.  You might even fantasize by making your partner jealous by hanging out with an attractive person of the opposite sex.  Individuals who have experienced betrayal have been known to get intoxicated and make late night calls to their former lovers.  In order not to commit such a childish mistake, handle the situation the mature way, and create a distance between you and your partner, at least for some time after it happens, explains Portland Singles.  If it happens that your partner has become a serial cheater, then go on and proceed with separate living arrangements.  Do not part ways with words like, "We can still be friends," or, "You can always count on me."  These types of phrases will lead your partner to believe there is a chance of reconciling things.  Rather, let your partner know that when you're ready, you'll be in touch with them, but not right now. 

However, if this seems like too extreme of a step, especially if this is the first time your partner has cheated on you, create a little space between the two of you, even if you both live together.  The idea of this space is to create an emotional and physical space between you and your partner, so you can think about what just happened and are able to make the right decisions for the future, explains Portland Singles.  

Decide What You Want To Do

Use the time away to consider what you want to do in your relationship.  Do you wish to forgive your partner and continue to be with them?  Or, do you want to forgive them altogether and move on with your own life without them?  Before you decide any action, think calmly and carefully about what your motives are.  Is it because you are still in love with your partner and would like to fix everything that went wrong the first time around, or are you not able to break up because you don't want to hurt your ego?  If you are married, would you want to forgive your cheating spouse solely because of financial reasons?  You know one thing here, if your spouse has cheated on you, you have solid grounds for divorce now, and the law will even be by your side.  However, many couples are able to put cheating behind them.  So don't doubt that your relationship can still be repaired.  But the only people who can decide to do that is you and your partner.

Think About What Went Wrong

Once you have decided to forgive your cheating partner and give your relationship another chance, think about everything that went wrong in the first place, suggests Portland Singles.  What made your partner cheat?  Did both of you fight over money issues?  Was it because of a lack of sex?  Or, did your in-laws have something to do with it?  Was it because you neglected their feelings, or because your partner wanted you to become something you were not?  In such cases, sometimes it's best to seek a marital therapist to get help in figuring out what the real issue was.  Marital experts believe that before someone commits adultery, there are undying issues that made them head in that direction. 

Get Professional Help

If you cannot seem to be able to forgive your partner for their infidelity, or get rid of hateful thoughts about your ex if you broke up with them, then it might be a good idea to seek professional help now.  A therapist or counselor will be able to help you cope with your feelings of hurt and betrayal, explains Portland Singles, since you cannot do it on your own.  More than the act of infidelity is all the lies that is more distressing for a partner that has been betrayed.  The first step out of this mess is a return of honesty, followed by mutual commitment to put things behind.  This can be done only if two people are able to put the infidelity behind them.